When we hear the word egg, first thing that comes in our mind is a nice egg fry with an intact yolk. It is a vital part of our daily consumption. We take egg in so many ways. From bread toast to ice cream dessert- it’s all egg. But there is an antipathy towards it. Why people throw eggs when they are disgusted? (Vegemite jars makes so much better choice.)
Wikipedia has a slightly different view of egg. Even internet search results of ‘egg’ show a deliberate repugnance towards it. Wikipedia says-
an egg (Latin, ovum) is the zygote, resulting from fertilization of the ovum.
What could be a more disgusting way to describe an egg? Our perception of egg is a lot different from any of its online definitions. Wiki was not done. Its other descriptions are
Strange enough none of them acknowledge egg as food. With more and more new technology and food processing techniques coming up everyday, ultimate consumers are becoming less and less aware of their food’s origin.
Disclaimer: This post is written for guys. Girls can also try. Results may vary.
World famous Bengali scientist Dr. GU Dey is the author of the best-seller book- Human Emotions: Love, Sex and everything unimportant. He has done profound study on the science behind male and female outlook over ‘which one is more important: love or sex?’ Today he will enlighten those poor souls who wish to have girlfriends but can’t afford one and then pretend that ‘oh I’m not into love, I’m into sex’ kind of guys.
There are many articles on how to get a girlfriend or how to find a girlfriend but what they are saying is approach girls, be confident, be witty, be attractive etc. But where is the how to be confident or how to be witty post? We understand that any man who has all these calibers will never need to read such thing. Here is the solution you have been looking for so long. These steps don’t require you to be attractive or witty. This is the secret mantra behind every Tom, Dick and Hairy getting a girlfriend and not you. Now even you can get girlfriend by just following these easy steps. Yes you can.
First choose your niche. What kind of girl you will be good at? Various types of niches are- 1. Bomb-shell, 2. Hot, 3. Sexy, 4. Sweet, 5.Cute, 6.blonde dumb, 7.Studious, 8.Orthodox, 9. atleast she’s a girl etc. etc.
So choose wisely. Don’t choose anything you dream to be good at- be truthful to yourself. Ask yourself how much do you worth? This will help you decide which niche you should follow. Although there are many different types of girls yet all of them follow the same protocol.
Panir is now bl_nk. Complete blank. He is thinking nothing. This is happening to him for last few days. Hours pass by when he thinks nothing, feels nothing. Is this good? Whenever he thinks of something- he feels sad. It’s like as zero is greater than -10, similarly thinking nothing is better than thinking sad. But his doctor says thinking nothing is not normal. People usually think something as long as they are awake, then they dream. So if Panir is not thinking anything et al. it means he is not fully functional. Seems like a custom-made paradox. He can either be fully functional and sad or unfit and not feel anything. Which way to take is the question.
His cell phone starts beeping. Message. Health Services has sent a reminder sms saying he has an appointment with Dr. Adams today at 3:15 pm. You have an appt with Dr Adams on Thurs, 10 Dec 2009 at 3:15 PM. Please reply with Y to confirm or N to cancel this appt. Non attendance may incur fees. How stupid a sms can be. He can see the number from which this message been sent. It’s a local 10 digit mobile number. Yet they make it sound like a machine generated text. Press Y for ‘yes’ and N for ‘no’. When the Health Service System is this stupid then how could they treat some other’s stupidity? Sumit’s list of dilemmas were multiplying in numbers as fast as rats in damp warehouse.
First thing Panir does when he wakes up in the morning is to switch on his laptop. Sometimes he won’t even shut down his system at night and wake up to sit with it again. He looks at the clock in the right-bottom corner of the screen. His vision is still blurry from the long sleep. It’s 12 noon. Good, his sleeping hygiene is now as bad as Calcutta General Govt. Hospital. ‘I can either leave my bed now, brush my teeth have a late breakfast or I can sleep for some more time- then wake up and have lunch at proper lunch-time’. Panir starts to feel happy and closes his eye lids again.
In October ’09 actor Rahul Bose gave this amazing speech at an engineering college. Rahul Bose is an actor, captain of the Indian National Rugby Team, a social activist and founder of a NGO. I liked his dreams. It was a compilation of wishes which every responsible human being has deep down his heart. Rahul pointed out that in the college everyone has 80 percent idealism and 20 percent responsibility while as one moves out of college it is 80 percent responsibility and 20 percent idealism.
I also have dreams. But I ain’t no NGO founder or national rugby player or even an accomplished actor. In fact I have no accomplishments. So my dreams are a bit different from his.
This is the most frequently asked question over phone to the girlfriends. But why what are you wearing, why not something else? How come everybody is asking the same question? How do they know when to ask, whom to ask?
There is a Bengali proverb which goes as-
Ducklings need not to learn swimming.
I find this very apt in this context. If you are a female older than 18 then you must have come across this question- What are you wearing now? And guys- you might not even remember how many times you asked this. (For a few more skillful guys they might not even be able to count how many girls they asked it!) What I find interesting here is that nobody had actually ever told these boys about this particular question but somehow all of them figure it out by them self in due time. It’s almost like those ducklings who somehow know exactly how to swim the moment they are born, while humans with a much bigger brain size find it difficult and absolutely nobody is born with the ability to swim on the first time they get into water. Apparently swimming is in their genes and so duckling need not to be taught anymore.
So the question is how is everybody asking the same question? and what blows me away is- why do girls answer this question? Girls see it coming. Yet they let it happen. (Guys, let me tell you something- if you think that you can outsmart the girl with your perfectly timed questions then you are in fool’s paradise. Girls always know what they are saying. Most probably she has deceived you with her simple-minded, talkative girl appearance. Just think- of all those infinite sentences she told to you last night- how many really had any information in them?)
I always feel like writing blog, every other day my mind thinks of the Best Blog Title .com and a whole new genre of ‘very less/never discussed topic of blogging’. But the moment I sit to write something- nothing seems to be the perfect first entry. 😦
I keep reading RSS of ‘how to write your blog?’ to ’15 ways to keep getting traffic to your blog’… but it still doesn’t help. ftw! I am here at last writing my 1st post and now I don’t give a damn ’bout how it turns out. whether its catchy enough or not? whether the title says it all but hides enough to maintain interest? I really don give a fuck! You know something- you can be a lot more creative than usual, once you can come out of ‘what will others think?’ stigma. Atleast thats what i’m feeling right now and see here is my 1st blog entry in progress… 😉